This week was quite the rollercoaster, but I'm pumped!

This week was quite a ride. So I tried to give my new job a few more days, but on the Tuesday I had enough. I couldn't focus the entire day because I was too deep into thinking about how I really can't meet the expectations of the job and how it really wasn't the right fit.

I didn't know anything in my third week still. It was terrible. I felt so bad because there were some passionate people we had meetings with, and I couldn't really understand the content. I didn't feel confident that I could help people like them in the future.

I knew then and there that I wasn't going to receive training on the industry, and that things wouldn't change, so I quit the next day. Took a day to process things on my end and then the next day I had to come for an exit. Ended things smoothly but then some other stuff was brought up. I've decided to put it aside for now and just focus on my job search.

I had an interview for a virtual contract position that would basically be self-employment, as I would need to figure out some things for taxes on my own. 

I was fairly confident at the middle of the week that I could go forward with this work and try to do some more video freelance work, but I'll really need to research more about that, so I'm going to meet up with some people to chat about how they do their self-employment. 

Then today I decided to go on Kijiji just to see what's out there, and when I saw that there were others looking for employment to get by, reality hit me. I have all of these things I want to try that I don't know what kind of income it will bring, but I have bills to pay. I tried to not let it get me too much today but it's really true, but then again, I'm just going to give it a try for a bit and if I need to look at other more full-time gigs then I will. And I have, so I'm ok, I just have to be positive, because eventually these contract things and freelance work will help me make a full-time income. :)

I spent the rest of the week job searching and am now waiting for a contract for the virtual position. I'm going to keep searching, but also keep researching on how to make things work for me. I'm also going to hang out with some friends and try to attend some networking events in the new year. 

Weekly recap:

Thursday - Had our party at our place with friends. Ordered Wow Chicken, gave away prizes, played Catchphrase and some Jack in the Box. We also gave everyone some cards and treat bags. :)

Friday - Went to my previous job's Christmas party, had a great time and told everyone about how my job wasn't the right fit, no bad feelings!! 

Saturday - Chilled at home for a bit and got my cards done and what not. Got orange juice. :)

Sunday - Went to my parents and had some pho for lunch!

Today was Christmas dinner at home with the famjam. :) Got a few gifts that I will put to good use!

Tomorrow I'll just be chilling out at my parents' for a bit and then once the boif comes back we'll go home together. 

It's almost April!

I haven't blogged in weeks!! So many things have happened lately.

1) I got a stomach ache and was sick for a few days after drinking a tea latte from Starbucks. I was really into their Peach Blossoming Tea Latte they had on promo for the Lunar New Year. However, it's usually made up with Earl Grey tea, peach syrup, milk and peach sprinkles... but I went to several places and they all ran out of earl grey, so I couldn't get the original. I settled with a tea latte that had peach tea in it with milk... that was not a good idea. I actually thought the barista was going to make it with a different black tea and still do the syrup, but the way they made it was with vanilla to give the earl grey taste with a peach tea instead... I am not sure if the milk was out of date, or if it was just the mix of peach together, but the next morning I felt so gross! I couldn't stomach any meals, I could only eat little bits of food. I was in bed all weekend. Thankfully, I got better in a few days. Since then, I haven't touched any milk drinks at all.

2) I celebrated my 6th year anniversary with my boyfriend, and so we decided to have a nice lunch for Big Taste. I got this pork belly sandwich that was soaked in OIL... little did I know, despite how delicious it was, it was going to give me a sore throat. Later that day I felt my throat acting up with some phlegm... and I didn't help it much at all by eating more greasy food (fries and a Costco sandwich). I was feeling fine until the next few days. Having a sore throat is terrible. It hurt so much to swallow and I was not helping my throat by eating garlic cloves. I thought the garlic cloves would help me get better, but it made me salivate more... I also ate them before bed, so I was salivating and swallowing many times while trying to sleep. It was painful. :( At that point, I wondered if I should get checked for strep throat and get antibiotics. But I read that it's better my body naturally fights it off itself to prevent future strep throat. I found out that Apple Cider Vinegar acts as a natural antibiotic... so for about two to three days I gargled that and drank it with water. Seriously, it worked SO well. Within a day I was feeling so much better, and then after the second day the pain was completely gone. I feel really good right now, but I do have a cough still. I actually lost my voice for a few days... I was freaking out since if I had an interview my voice would not be ready.

3) I had an interview with an architecture company for an office admin position. The day of my interview was when I had the sore throat and got a fever... I don't think I performed my best and I probably sounded like I was straining my voice. They moved on with another candidate. I was hoping that I could at least do the assessment they were planning on giving to shortlisted candidates... but I was not selected. I wrote a really good thank you letter too, I was really passionate for the job.

4) Update on the recruitment firm jobs... basically they both did not work out. The first job, the employer was not okay with taking vacation during the temp role since it was for a medical leave. The second job, someone else was selected. However, on the day I was supposed to hear from my recruiter, she was out of the office sick, so I did not hear from her until the next day. I wonder if she was at work, would I have still had a chance? Oh well, they probably chose someone with more experience.

5) I've been working on my first client for graphic design! I'm currently working on some Twitch TV layouts for this person's stream/channel. Really fun stuff since I can be creative. :)

6) I started a new WordPress site to blog about beauty, fashion, travel, food and tech! For now, it's a beauty blog, but ultimately I want to update it frequently so I can also show it for future job applications. I need to build my writing portfolio, so this would be a very good way to do that. I'm currently figuring out a design for it, though.

Yeah, a lot happened! Now that I am better, I can finally focus and start doing things I have been putting off for the last week. Laundry, studying Japanese, CLEANING, graphic designing, revamping my portfolio site and adding graphic design to it, and applying to jobs.

Having my voice back too, I can go on interviews and not worry about sounding strange! I applied to a lot of jobs recently, so hopefully I can get an interview and a new job very soon! I really need a job right now as my finances are getting tighter and tighter. I want to hang out with my friends but I really need to limit my spending right now until I get a job.

I think about it now and yes, I could have applied for a job at a coffee shop and worked that for a bit while I searched, but the possibility of a good opportunity coming up made me ponder that I did not want to quit a job so short-term... however, I could work part-time on the weekends or evenings with that job and still have a day job as well, but if I did, then I would have little time to focus on my creative interests in graphic design and in volunteering. But yes, having a job at a coffee shop would be very nice during the day for sure! However, I'm looking for something I can get a career in at the moment. Or very short-term contracts that are like a week or a month.

Looking back, I could have accepted that one offer back in November last year. It would have been a good stepping stone, but I was really adamant about having social interaction and a team environment. I know that's important to me right now, but I think I would've accepted it back then if I had known my job search would take a while.

Recruiters!

I may have a job this week!

I spoke with a recruiter from an agency for a receptionist position for their client last week. I was told I would hear something today, but I didn't... so maybe I'll hear back from them tomorrow, or the job has been filled, since it had an immediate start for this week.

I spoke with another recruiter today for a position that's for a few weeks and can lead to permanent status for the right candidate. Hoping to hear back tomorrow too, since the start was either tomorrow or this Wednesday. This recruiter actually reached out to me, since they thought my background would make me a great fit, and I think it does.

Hoping I hear from more employers as well. It will be so nice to get back into the workforce again. I really need to start studying again, clean, and work on graphic design and video stuff soon... but I haven't had the motivation as I have been applying to jobs a lot, watching J-dramas, gaming and volunteering. I need to focus on hobbies too, but I feel once I get a job, I can focus on those better.

I have been cleaning lately, though! I cleaned my makeup brushes for once, which is something I should do more often... I also got myself a mini steamer for my clothes. It's a fun way to take wrinkles out of my clothes, but I am still learning, so my first time wasn't perfect, but it did do the job. I do my laundry more frequently too, I guess. So, I am gradually getting better at this cleaning thing.

I haven't studied in a long time. Oops. Definitely will get back to it right away! My bf bought Influent on Steam, so I'm going to play it and study with it at the same time. It would be a new way of learning/practice. :)

I am kind of bummed out that I wasn't able to use my education right away and get a film or marketing related job... I know I need to build more experience, so I am going to do some volunteering in marketing/social media when I can. But I guess a lot of people don't have positions that utilize their educational background... but I can say that about 90% of the people I am around most of the time, have positions in their educational background... it's tough when this is the environment I am in, but I have to think long-term and what would get me there.

Anyway, here's hoping that I will find an awesome job soon!

Back to square one?

I heard back from the interviewer and they said they went in a different direction. However, they would like to consider me as a freelance if any opportunities come up. I expressed my interest in future opportunities and asked for any feedback. I haven't heard from them, so I have no idea if I will get any feedback.

It will be really nice if they do have any freelance gigs available for me to work on. I could use the experience and network for sure.

Speaking of freelance, I put out a status on my LinkedIn and received a response to video edit for an indie show. I took a look at one of the episodes they had available, and I am not sure if I want to edit it. I want to edit projects that I know I could use in my portfolio, not just to pay the bills. The client has asked if I wanted to try editing an episode and what my rate was... I'm still contemplating about it. I'm very careful of what I work on now, because I need to have quality work to show future gigs/employers.

After attending five interviews and being rejected so many times... I've decided that right now, I should get a FT job that has great management, a fast-paced environment, 9 - 5 ish kind of hours, and a great team with many opportunities to grow. I will then pursue my passions on the side, and see if I can do freelancing work in graphic design and video editing (if possible) and maybe even basic website design/maintenance. This takes me back to square one, which is what I was doing when I was out of school, focusing on these interests on the side.

 Freelance video editing is a bit difficult if I have a FT day job, since it usually requires meeting up with the client during working hours, and then discussing their needs, and sometimes they want a videographer as well. Also, I found it has been quite difficult to find clients. I need a mentor.

Freelance graphic design/web design could have the same challenge too, except I think it's much easier because edits can be asked and followed-up through e-mail. But there's also the challenge of work hours... then again, I might just have to find clients who don't have the same work hours as I would, such as auto dealers, retailers, independent businesses, etc. So there is options for sure.

I read a posting saying I should stick with a job for at least two years, otherwise employers might think that a short-term job history could be repeated at their own company. For me, I have been working with temp jobs in the past, so I think it's time to find a good solid job for a couple of years.

So what kind of jobs should I look at while I pursue my passions in media?

I'm looking at HR admin/assistant roles, admin assistant roles and industries in oil & gas, real estate and other services. I'm also looking at marketing too, but it's been a challenge from the history of job interviews I've had.

I will continue to stay optimistic and positive. I will find an awesome job and pursue my passions!

Hmmm...

It's getting close to March. If I don't count the small jobs I have done, it will be a 7 month job search so far. Yikes! If I do count my small jobs, then, I've only been job hunting for a month and a half to two months, so that's not bad.

But 7 months... ack.

I'm just trying to think about what I should apply to...

I'm waiting to hear back from my interview last week. The interviewer mentioned they would make a decision mid-week, this week. It's Thursday now.

I've been applying to a few marketing-related jobs, but I haven't heard back yet. Reviews for applications takes time.

I tried to look at temp jobs, but some of the agencies I've looked at will not consider me because I specified that I was looking for roles in marketing and communications, when all they have at the moment is administrative jobs not in those fields, or in very small companies where growth to those departments is non-existent... and they want some one long term, and don't have any temp jobs, so I'm not being considered.

I'm looking at other job agencies. Maybe I can find a one month or two month assignment?

There are also some oil and gas companies hiring for reception and office admin positions... but I'm very hesitant, because I really didn't like those roles in the past. But then, some of these positions include marketing duties, so I do have some interest in the position.

Ah, what to do...

I'll keep applying to roles I want to work in, and roles where I could get my foot in the door. I have to remember that I am in control of accepting an offer, so there's nothing to be hesitant about when I apply.

I guess I'm just hesitant because I know I'm starting to get desperate for a job... just like I did during my last job search...

Ideally, I'd like to find a long term role, but if it is long term, it has to be in my career choice or with really good flexibility to move up to my desired position.

Follow Up

I decided to follow up yesterday and I received a reply today.

The company decided to go forward with another applicant, however, they would still like to keep me as a candidate as their team is expanding. Yay!! That makes me super happy. Another thing is that they've forwarded my name to their video production team for any contracts that made come up from time to time, and I could help with editing. That means a lot to me, as I really do want to work this company. I would love to be able to help them with future opportunities!

I am still sad about not receiving the role, as I've been looking for jobs for so long... It's been about 6 months already. I was able to find three jobs during that time (two I took, and one I declined), and the jobs that I actually accepted did not turn out to be the right fit.

Right now I'm looking for any temporary roles in admin jobs. I can consider reception... aiming for short term assignments that are about 1 - 3 months in length. It would be nice to experience different and better cultures/environments/industries. And also, I'm looking for long term commitments in my industry, but that is the long term goal.

Tomorrow, I'm going to call up two recruiting agencies. Hopefully I can get an interview for this week or/and early next week. I'm really looking forward to working again.

Progress, yay!

Received an e-mail that I have to come in to sign a form and then pick-up my pay this afternoon, asked if I could come in tomorrow. Hopefully will get a response soon.

I applied for a marketing job today through a recruiter, and a few minutes later I received a call. :) The recruiter personnel turned out to be the same person who I interviewed with about 6 months ago for a different position. They invited me to come in for a chat about the position tomorrow, since they said they already know me from when we last met/talked. I'm excited, this is the first time I have had a meeting with the same recruitment firm twice.

The position is a temporary position, so I'm ready to learn more about the role and about the company.

I have to wake up early tomorrow, lately I have been having a bit of trouble sleeping, I usually get a couple hours of sleep, and then I wake up and try to sleep but it doesn't work out. So I become really tired after running my errand and then take a nap right after. I think it's because last time I tried to go to sleep a few hours too early than I usually do, so I think tonight I will go asleep around 11:30 or midnight.

I am definitely getting better at applying for jobs that I am qualified for/interested in/have to do with the fields I want to go in. :)

:D

Well, maybe I am much closer to my dream job than I thought!

A while ago I applied to a film-related job. It involves both customer service, and maybe some video editing, and it's sort of within the film industry. :) A few days later, I got an e-mail asking for a phone chat from the employer! We've schedule it for the upcoming week. Hurrah, opportunities!!!

Also, I decided to apply to a posting that is looking for freelance video editors. I thought, why not? I can still build my portfolio and the schedule would probably be more flexible, so I could work on the weekends or evenings, and since I'd be using my own equipment, I could just work at home on my own time/while I find a new job.

I must start rehearsing for my phone interview.

Oi, oi

Job hunting is a challenge.

I post ads up on Kijiji and I get responses, a few responses are usually from start-ups. I am trying to stay away from start-ups because I want to gain experience with a medium to large sized company first, as start-ups usually rely on an individual's expertise, and they might pay lower than usual.

I need to keep on smiling and be positive.

Employers will get back to me for sure.

I just need to keep applying.

I've actually applied for so many jobs already... 20 or so... I need to keep up with each job I'm applying to. I know I won't receive responses to all of them, but if I can receive one or two replies, I will be really happy!

My typical day goes like this:

Eat, search and apply for jobs
Eat, watch dramas, do chores
Search for jobs again
Make some graphics or do other stuff
Sleep

Job hunting is a full-time commitment. It's very hard to be selective about jobs too. I am really trying to stay away from reception jobs, and invoice jobs... I'm good at those roles and tasks, but they aren't my favourite. I want to work within a team.

Short term goals and long term goals

And so it's been two days of job hunting and applications. I have not receive any callbacks, but it's the week right after the holidays so companies are probably catching up with work first, before making any hiring decisions. I understand. The timeframe feels sooo long to me, but for them, days go by.

My short terms goals for a job are:

Get any part time or full time job that pays well and makes me happy. 8 - 4 or 9 - 5 kind of job, no weekends/evenings, still allows me to pursue my volunteer and freelance interests outside of work hours. Industry does not matter right now. No invoicing work. Admin is okay, reception is okay if it's in an industry I want to get into.

I need to get a job within a month, to fund my future goals for this year.
I am applying to admin, assistant and film/marketing related roles at the moment.

My long term job goals:

Find a full time position in a happy job in a marketing or film related role, such as Graphic Designer, Video Editor, Marketing Assistant/Coordinator, Communications Coordinator, Digital Media Producer, etc...  and if it pays well, that's a bonus! I would also like a job with benefits, and definitely no weekends/evenings unless a lot of notice is given in advance.

Would be super awesome if I can meet my long term goal within a month too! But if not, then I can meet this goal after I have completed my short term goal to provide funding for my future goals for the year. :)

So far, I have been doing well with my new year resolutions. I am keeping more clean, but I have yet to do a super clean. I'm still easing into it, but I try to clean up as soon as I can after I'm finished eating/using something. I have not worked out yet, but I stretch everyday and do tiny bits of exercise, so that's a start! I am also drinking tea more often now (wasn't a resolution, but it's much healthier). I have also thought about doing graphic design at least once a day to build a portfolio, and am finalizing my schedule for gaming streams and YouTube. :) Now, as soon as I can get a job, a lot of these accomplishments might be easier, because then I can fund for the things I will need/allot appropriate time to each activity!

Looking at other opportunities...

After working at my internship for almost three weeks... I can conclude a few things:

1) I will not receive formal training. Already three weeks in, and no training. I think that ship has sailed.
2) Is there a point to stay in this internship, other than the pay? At the end of each month I have to fill out a report saying what I have learned. I haven't learned anything except from myself...
3) This internship solely helps the employer and not me. My employer thinks I have a solid bg in this area, and that's probably why they aren't training me. D:
4) This organization has no clue how to train for this role... that is why they have an intern.

So yup... I am looking for other opportunities.

A nice opportunity came up. It's a starting point but it's at an agency, and that is exactly what I wanted to do. Get my foot in the door at an agency, learn the ropes and apply them and grow within the company.

I just feel like this internship is kind of pointless for me... I thought in internships you were supposed to learn from someone who has expertise in that field for your role. Perhaps that's only for current students though. Thankful my practicum during my school days had a requirement where the employer needed 5 years of expertise in the field you are interning for... so if this was a practicum, it would not qualify.

I am really disappointed but all I can do right now is keep applying for other opportunities and hold it out until I find something.

Hmm

I really need to find a job soon.

But I really can't give up and settle for less. I still look at admin positions and I'm curious as to what kind of companies these positions are for, and how big the company is... I'm gauging for the room for growth. That's really important if I decide to take a position that isn't really to my liking, but a foot in the door.

I've been trying to apply to at least one job per day. The waiting game is long, but I have to keep active. I will find a good job very soon!!

I'm also considering temp jobs for only a few months or weeks. I need some income right now and it'd be a good way of getting to know new companies. Kind of like an internship, but not really, and paid. :)

I haven't heard back from the marketing company yet... I hope I'm not out of the running.

I'm just going to keep applying to interesting jobs and get interviews. :) No settling for less!

Chin up!

I declined the job offer I had after talking with a few people about it... it definitely wasn't the right fit, and I couldn't ignore the red flags. Culture is important and I shouldn't take a position if it doesn't fit. Also, I'm very determined to find a job I will be happy with, and I wouldn't want to put the burden on the company if I needed to resign right away. So I would've started today if I had accepted. Back to job hunting.

Since then, a lot of things have been looking good. I'm currently in consideration for a marketing job for a marketing consultant's client, I'm not sure what stage I am at right now in the interview process, but it looks pretty good. They're asking me a lot of questions about my experience. But the thing is I don't know too much about whether it's a right fit. I think it's a part-time position based on the job ads that they have posted on sites, but I'm not even sure if it's an ongoing position. Seems like a position for a month or a few months. Also, one of the requirements listed was a drivers license, which I don't have, but when I had the phone interview, I think the interviewer said they might be able to get around that, and asked if I use public transportation. I know this job has a lot of locations I would need to get to, in other cities... so I don't know, but it looks like they are still considering me.

Also, today I received a response to my intern ad. There's a company looking for an intern, unpaid right now but they said there will be paid opportunities in February. I replied with a resume and my portfolio as per their request, so hopefully we can work something out. I really would like to learn more about marketing and the possibility for a paid opportunity is also really awesome! Hopefully the hours are reasonable, I will still need to work a job in the mean time.

I also applied to one job today, so hopefully I can get an interview soon!!! I applied to a few positions a while ago, but their due dates aren't until the first week of December. I am trying to reach my goal of finding an opportunity before the holiday season, and be able to have an offer for the new year.

New plan

I was able to get an interview this upcoming Monday! It's an admin job, but the employer sounds very open to having me help with social media and video for the company as well. I'm very excited and I hope I can ace the interview.

The phone interview was on Thursday, and was pretty interesting. Basically the interviewer started off by asking me what my schedule was like and why I was open to a PT position. Then they asked about my admin experience and said I matched 70% of what they were looking for. Afterwards, I was advised they would be sending an email by the end of the day to let candidates know if they made it to the next round of face-to-face interviews. I then asked my question and then the interviewer was scrolling through my resume and asked me about my social media experience, then they noticed my video editing experience as well. Then they admitted they went on a tangent and that this talk could be saved for an in-person interview if I was selected... then instantly, the interviewer changed their mind and just scheduled me right then for an in-person interview this Monday! I'm pretty excited because the company is really interesting and I'm happy they found my other skills valuable to them. I'll have to emphasize them for sure when they ask why I should be hired.

I need to practice more for my interview. I'm going to wake up early tomorrow (today) and the day of and do a rehearsal. I need to remember some stories to tell and be as positive as I can be and myself!

I also need to iron my clothes and shine my shoes. Hopefully the weather will be good too!

My new plan is to first, get a job so I can be financially secure again and build my experience. I'm then going to start building my portfolio in web design, graphic design, social media and video production as much as I can on a part time basis. Then take that experience and apply that to work!

I really hope I can get a new job before the end of the month. I know I can, I know I can! :D

Losing hope :(

I think the goal now is to find a FT job... any FT job that isn't selling something.

I thought about this, and realized having a FT job is more secure than what I'm doing now (no job/side jobs). It's secure because it'll be FT, and I can keep working the job until I find something better.

Or it can be an awesome FT job and I won't want to find something better. <---basically a="" aiming="" am="" been="" but="" challenge.="" for="" i="" it="" p="" s="" what="">
I'm looking at admin jobs. Sigh. I need to stop it, but I'm looking at the FT ones. I realize people have to start somewhere, and a few of my friends did start at reception jobs... and worked their way up. I need to learn this mentality that I will grow professionally. I will be able to take my experience and move up.

I'm being more picky though, trying to find ones that aren't office admin. I want to be a department admin instead. I don't want to order office supplies, greet guests and answer the reception phone. :(

Also, the thing with admin jobs is sometimes there's absolutely nothing to do. Some companies are okay with you reading a book, but there's a lot of companies who aren't. I really don't like being bored. When there's nothing to do, of course you could socialize with your co-workers, talk to them to pass the time. A lot of my past positions I didn't have that luxury... I was usually working alone :( I want to work in a team environment.

I'm going to keep my head up high and apply for lots of FT jobs.

I also thought about going back to my old routine, where I worked both a FT and a PT job. Except this time it won't be PT, it'll be more freelancing/casual. This way I can still develop in my field and be able to take that experience forward.

C'mon, I can do it! I have one more week to meet my goal. I can do this.

Phone call

I got my answer via phone call yesterday evening. My heart was pounding when I picked up the phone and heard the recruiter call. They rejected me over the phone. I'm disappointed I didn't get the position. But they said I interviewed well which was good, and they'll keep my resume on file as they will have more opportunities in February.

Today I was trying to update my resume to apply for a position and I had accidentally applied before I could update my resume. So I called the recruiter to ask if there was anything I could do. She informed me that I could resubmit my resume by email and she immediately asked what salary range I was looking for... Because she didn't have a chance to look at my application, I just gave her a range and she said the position definitely fits that range and that she will pass my resume on to her colleague who is taking care of that position. I'm hoping I will get a call! Another position was posted shortly after that I'm interested in, so I'm going to apply in the morning. My goal is to get a new job within the next two weeks! I know I can do it!

Waiting

A lot of the job postings in the past week haven't been of the jobs I would like to apply for. I have to keep telling myself to stop looking at administrative work, because it's easy to do, but I need to be selected and find a job I'd be happy with.

I followed up again today about the interview I had. No immediate response, hopefully I can hear something before the end of the week. I'm also hoping to get call backs for interviews. Job hunting can be so tough in this field/industry...

Ideally I'd like to get into marketing/media, so that's the type of job I'm looking at right now. There's a lot of entry-level, no experience positions being posted, but I had an interview at one of those agencies and it didn't feel right at all. Lots of red flags.


I'm hoping there will be a lot of postings I can apply to this week. I haven't been meeting my quota of one application per day. :( It's really hard to be selective, but I really shouldn't settle for less. A lot of my friends love their jobs, and I want to be like that too. Love my job.

Freelancing is ok for building experience, but it's really unstructured at the moment, and the work I get varies.

Schedule

I really need to get my shit together.

For the past month I haven't stuck with a proper schedule for anything, which is probably why I'm having such a difficult time figuring out things/doing things I should be doing.

I do have a schedule for what days I do certain projects, but that's not enough. I need something that's by the hour.

My current schedule is mostly sleeping around 3am or 5am, and then waking up at 1pm, unless I have to go out, which I would wake up around 11am.

Obviously these times are pretty darn late, so I've been trying to improve lately, but my body gets really tired so I end up taking a nap... then the cycle continues.

I know I take naps because I'm just bored. I don't have motivation to do the work I need to do, which was my fault in the first place for accepting this work. :( But I need to make money/get a real job.

Tomorrow I've got a meeting with a friend on a video project we're doing. Originally it was scheduled for the morning, but I've asked to reschedule for the afternoon, so we'll meet then. I did that because waking up early is a challenge for me. But you know what? Starting tomorrow, I'll aim to wake up around 9:30AM, and then slowly aim to wake up around 8AM... etc.

As for my sleeping pattern, I will aim for earlier.

For my schedule, it should play out like this:

9:30AM - get up and get ready to work
10:00AM - eat breakfast
11:00AM - work
12:00PM - have lunch
1:00PM - Work or do whatever needs to be done during that day
12:00AM - go to bed

That's how it should be. But on some days it's not like that because I have to work with other people's schedules. Here goes to trying to stick to this schedule! I need structure in my daily life. Fit in there job hunting as well! (That can be the 'work' part if I don't have anything to work on.)

In other news, the position the recruiter contacted me for, went to their first candidate, as they were no longer taking interview candidates in. Makes sense I guess, since the position started/starts this week. I also haven't heard from my interview yet, I'm thinking of following up again next Monday, but perhaps to the hiring manager this time. I usually get some kind of notification after an interview after following up... but I haven't heard anything. I'm hoping it's just because they are busy, and not because someone is away, or that they really don't want to let me know.

I've been contacting a bunch of agencies to ask if they're hiring, let's see if they will reply. I also applied to a job posted from a recruiter, so maybe that will turn up too. It's really hard not to just give in and settle for anything, but I need to remember if I do that, would I be willing to stay in that position for a few years? I definitely need to be sure that when I apply, I will be happy. Because if I apply even though I don't think the job will be that great, and I do get an interview and an offer, then well, you know me, I'd be very inclined to take the offer because that's usually the only offer.

I applied for a position yesterday as well, at a company I had interviewed for a while back, but didn't get the position because it was being reworked. I've been networking with a contact from there, so I'm hoping I can get an interview!

At least I know...

I didn't hear anything yesterday, so I followed-up with an email. A few minutes later, I was notified I wasn't short-listed for the test and that there were over 100 applicants. I thanked them and asked for some feedback, they advised it was the depth and breadth of my experience... so I guess I've learned a lesson... I can definitely get the interview, but I got to make sure I back it up all the time with experience. I think experience is what a lot of people are looking for nowadays. Sure, if you're a great fit for the company, that is great, but sometimes I feel companies don't want to spend extra time training n a lot of things for one candidate, that another candidate already has experience in.

This is why I want to get my foot in the door and gain experience in the field I want to be in, so that I can be experienced to get those dream jobs.

But of course, this is a case-by-case thing, and not all companies/positions are like that. Some people will hire even if you don't have much experience. It really depends on the other candidates.

Despite being disappointed, I received good news. Today, I managed to speak with the recruiter for another job. I did the phone interview, and immediately she asked me to come in for an in-person interview, next week! I'm stoked because I am a fan of this organization, and the position is very relevant to my field, and uses my education, as well as my background.

After all these interviews I've gone through, I feel like I can just truly be myself from now on, and stop worrying so much, and just do what's right for me, but of course focus on telling how my experience will benefit the company.

I was doing a lot of research into the position and of those who have held it in the past. It looks like not a lot of people are in the position for very long, and move onto other positions. Gah. I wonder why that is. Maybe it's too stressful? Or they were on a contract? Or they went on a maternity leave (there was a gap in their work experience for about a year until their next position)?

Well, worrying doesn't help so, I'm going to not worry. I'm going to take some time tomorrow and throughout Friday/the weekend to research and rehearse. I'll think of some good questions as well.

I need to study for my casual job too. Then have training on Friday for a few hours. Also need to finish editing my project and then start editing my next project. Is this what YouTubers feel like when they edit videos often?

Seeking job

A lot has happened.

I quit my job at the start-up. Just wasn't the right fit for me and too many icky things going on, so I didn't want to continue that position.

I've had one interview since then for a social media position, still waiting on it, but turns out it's an internship... which isn't what I'm looking for, I need to get paid to pay bills :( If I were still a student, the internship would be a great opportunity. They seemed like they could make it a paid position, but we'll see if they get back to me soon.

I haven't heard anything from the freelancing gig yet, they told me a week ago they would decide this week, but now it's Saturday. Perhaps I'm not shortlisted anymore or they're looking for more candidates, as I've seen several additional postings of the position, since. I'll follow up today.

Right now I've got a lot of video editing to do, which includes my recent trip to PAX 2014/Seattle and some volunteering projects. After I finish my first two projects, then I'll be left with my ongoing volunteer project, which will allow me to focus on applying for more jobs and going to interviews.

There's this one position in the arts community I could apply for... however it's an admin position. :( I know I have to get my foot in the door, but I am so sick of administrative positions, but then again all the ones I've held previously were for industries I wasn't really too interested in, but were curious of. Perhaps it could be different with this one? I know this would be a more casual environment so I would probably enjoy it more, and it's a FT, permanent position.... which means I could grow in the company, right? I think I will apply.

I just want to have a job where I am happy, learning, using my background and am getting paid decently or more. Also, a job where there is opportunity to grow.

Freelancing right now is hard for me because I need to learn how to branch out of my shell and reach out to other companies. I definitely need to do a search and ask companies if they're interested in video service.

I also don't want to be stuck doing admin work... it really takes a special person to do clerical work, and I'm not that person.

Job calls, please!! :)