Happy Holidays!!
I actually had a pretty productive day today. Last night I stayed up reading some manga and so I didn't get a lot of sleep last night as I woke up at lunch time to have lunch. Then I imported my mom's phone photos/videos and put them onto a few DVDs, then I packed to go back home. After I got home, I immediately did a whole wack of things:
- Washed & dried our throw pillow cases & couch blankets
- Unwapped my final present (I left it at home since it was too big to carry) - Yay, I got a robe!!
- Finished off my vlogmas
- Edited my vlogmas
- Went to the gym for like 10 minutes (my phone died mid workout and so I had no music/no idea what time it was, so just did what I could and left lol)
- Unpacked all of my stuff
- Watched a few YouTube videos (while doing these things)
- Wiped door handles, some light switches, counter, faucets, toilet seats/buttons and my desk with vinegar
- Loaded the dishwasher and turned it on
- Took down the recycling and organics
- Handwashed some dishes
- Disposed expired food
- Made tea
- Cleaned my makeup brushes
All of that in 3.5 hours. Not too shabby! I'm just waiting for my vlog to export now. It's 11pm now and I'm not ready to sleep yet. I think I will find a drama to watch or some YouTube videos and maybe I will read a little bit of the Night Circus, or one of the conversation ebooks I've got reserved.
I might also try to find another manga to read tonight, but of course I should get more sleep than I did last night. I'm meeting up with some friends I haven't seen in months for lunch tomorrow, so got to freshen up for that and be awake!
I got a sleeping mask as one of my secret santa presents so I think I may use that tonight as well. I found a pimple on my forehead today, so maybe it'll help.
I don't think I'll go to bed too early today, it's still the holidays and I want to do a bunch of things before going back to work on Wednesday.
Monday, December 26, 2016
Saturday, December 24, 2016
Itinerary
It's half past five now and I'm sitting here thinking what I should do for the rest of the evening. I usually write this out in my BJ but I forgot to bring it with me. :(
- Head to dinner at my aunt's place
- Edit my vlogmas vlog and upload it before bed
- Finish the J-drama I've been watching (or maybe I'll just watch an episode tonight and the rest later)
- Play Overwatch (gotta get those xmas loots!)
- Watch more vlogmas
- Play with my dog
- maybe vlog more for vlogmas
- have tea
- read more about conversations
- look through snapchat
I forgot how cold it was in my room! I'm so used to the heat at my new place... hopefully I still have warm PJs here that don't have worms on them (that's a story I can save for later).
- Head to dinner at my aunt's place
- Edit my vlogmas vlog and upload it before bed
- Finish the J-drama I've been watching (or maybe I'll just watch an episode tonight and the rest later)
- Play Overwatch (gotta get those xmas loots!)
- Watch more vlogmas
- Play with my dog
- maybe vlog more for vlogmas
- have tea
- read more about conversations
- look through snapchat
I forgot how cold it was in my room! I'm so used to the heat at my new place... hopefully I still have warm PJs here that don't have worms on them (that's a story I can save for later).
Whyyyy
It's the holidays now and I'm back at my family's home for a few days. Already feeling at home but things are different. My old room is now somewhat an office and a storage space... haha, and my dog actually wants to spend more time with me. <3 p="">
A personal topic came up that I thought we had cleared and it is kind of making me uncomfortable. I am an adult now and I am responsible and can do what I want... but growing up in a traditional household is so tough, after moving out, I thought I was released from those traditional views, but when I returned today I learned otherwise. Sigh....
Hopefully it doesn't come up, I just hate trying to talk about my non-traditional perspective on it. But I guess avoiding it also doesn't really help because it's something they want to be done and talked about... it's a challenge when different cultures are involved.
Anyway...
We had a holiday party with friends. All of whom I've known for quite some time and I haven't really hung out with them as much since the summer. I usually am socially awkward, or at least I feel that way... I feel like no one really wants to talk to me, so when I talk to them, the conversation doesn't carry, or their paying attention to something else, or they're really not interested. It makes me feel uncomfortable when I see the same person chatting it up really well with someone else. It makes me feel like I'm not adequate enough for the event, not someone who is socialable, etc... so after sulking for quite a bit (I take this stuff personally :() and reflecting on my awkwardness, I got up and started researching.
I googled articles on how to carry a conversation. I already know how to ask open-ended questions to make the conversation get up and going, but I'm really bad at remembering that. I usually ask yes or no questions because I feel like time is of essence, you don't have much time to think of a response... I am that kind of person who needs time. Perhaps that stemmed from when I used to go online a lot and chat with people that way, writing gave me a chance to think about my response. In real life, that's soooo different. So that's something I have to improve on. I'm also the kind of person who uses a lot of generic terms that can make things go stale. I say, "Interesting," "that's cool," "sweet" etc. a lot and it can really kill a conversation. I also have trouble understanding things in one shot, and I also don't know what clarifying questions to ask sometimes.... I use how interested I am in the content to gauge how I'll respond. It's terrible and so it's something I have to improve on. Like wrapping up a conversation you don't want to be a part of would be a good skill because then it wouldn't be awkward/impolite...
I'm also googling how to make people want to talk to you.... I think that's the tough part. I don't know if it's my body language, but when people who have known you for a while & don't really want to engage in conversation with you or start one, it worries me greatly.
Maybe I am being too hard on myself. But I want to be thought of as that person who was really fun to talk to/hang out with, etc. Y'know?
We also had friends come over yesterday to play boardgames and chill. It was much more tame as there wasn't a lot of people, but I did feel listened to, although I was the one who mostly initiated conversation.
I will continue my research, haha....
Right now it's half past 2. I'm kind of bored. I didn't bring my Kobo or 3DS with me, but I did bring my phone, camera and laptop.... I guess I'll watch some youtube for a bit and play with my dog.
A personal topic came up that I thought we had cleared and it is kind of making me uncomfortable. I am an adult now and I am responsible and can do what I want... but growing up in a traditional household is so tough, after moving out, I thought I was released from those traditional views, but when I returned today I learned otherwise. Sigh....
Hopefully it doesn't come up, I just hate trying to talk about my non-traditional perspective on it. But I guess avoiding it also doesn't really help because it's something they want to be done and talked about... it's a challenge when different cultures are involved.
Anyway...
We had a holiday party with friends. All of whom I've known for quite some time and I haven't really hung out with them as much since the summer. I usually am socially awkward, or at least I feel that way... I feel like no one really wants to talk to me, so when I talk to them, the conversation doesn't carry, or their paying attention to something else, or they're really not interested. It makes me feel uncomfortable when I see the same person chatting it up really well with someone else. It makes me feel like I'm not adequate enough for the event, not someone who is socialable, etc... so after sulking for quite a bit (I take this stuff personally :() and reflecting on my awkwardness, I got up and started researching.
I googled articles on how to carry a conversation. I already know how to ask open-ended questions to make the conversation get up and going, but I'm really bad at remembering that. I usually ask yes or no questions because I feel like time is of essence, you don't have much time to think of a response... I am that kind of person who needs time. Perhaps that stemmed from when I used to go online a lot and chat with people that way, writing gave me a chance to think about my response. In real life, that's soooo different. So that's something I have to improve on. I'm also the kind of person who uses a lot of generic terms that can make things go stale. I say, "Interesting," "that's cool," "sweet" etc. a lot and it can really kill a conversation. I also have trouble understanding things in one shot, and I also don't know what clarifying questions to ask sometimes.... I use how interested I am in the content to gauge how I'll respond. It's terrible and so it's something I have to improve on. Like wrapping up a conversation you don't want to be a part of would be a good skill because then it wouldn't be awkward/impolite...
I'm also googling how to make people want to talk to you.... I think that's the tough part. I don't know if it's my body language, but when people who have known you for a while & don't really want to engage in conversation with you or start one, it worries me greatly.
Maybe I am being too hard on myself. But I want to be thought of as that person who was really fun to talk to/hang out with, etc. Y'know?
We also had friends come over yesterday to play boardgames and chill. It was much more tame as there wasn't a lot of people, but I did feel listened to, although I was the one who mostly initiated conversation.
I will continue my research, haha....
Right now it's half past 2. I'm kind of bored. I didn't bring my Kobo or 3DS with me, but I did bring my phone, camera and laptop.... I guess I'll watch some youtube for a bit and play with my dog.
Tuesday, December 20, 2016
Oops... It's almost 2017!
Whoa, it's almost been a whole year again since I last made a post.
I started this blog a few years ago, on the pretense that I would update it quite frequently to keep my writing up to date and to relieve any stress or to just talk about whatever is going on.
I really haven't done that and I honestly don't know why. For the last few months, a lot of things had happened. I'm still at my current work, I moved, and I'm updating my other blog more often and right now I'm doing vlogmas!
I think I've accomplished a lot, but this entire year I have been a VERY lazy person, and it needs to stop! It's okay to be lazy once in a while, but it kind of pains me because I am way too lazy and I always say I'll do all these cool things that are part of my goals, but I haven't come close to achieving those goals!!! Ahhhhh.
So I came back here to rant and outline my game plan. So uh, yeah, my game plan is:
- Make YouTube videos every month at least (if I can do once a week, that'll be a super achievement)
- Advertise my freelance biz more and get more prospects
- Blog as much as I can, focus on social media and build a brand
The ultimate goal is to be able to source my own income. That's my career goal and for my personal goals I would like to poke into my creativity a little more. I want to colour all of my coloring books (I have so many!), read the books I haven't picked up in a while (and read new ones), keep writing in this journal and a bunch of other fun stuff.
What I have done this year is gone to a lot of theatre shows, played more boardgames and also hung out with friends. I want to keep on doing this but also add the other things above as well.
Vlogmas is soooo tough! It's super challenging for me to vlog everyday because I don't do different things each day as often, so I have kinda been taking a break. I still need to finish editing Days 14 - 18 and put that up on YouTube. It's much easier to blog... haha but with blogging I definitely need to read more so I can build up my writing and vocabulary. It's a win-win situation!
Wow, writing this post really helped me unleash a lot of things I've been building up inside. It's tough for me to get stress out sometimes. Journaling was always something I did when I was younger to help understand myself better, to help me reflect and to help me feel more at ease with whatever was going on, so I better keep this up! Although, I do miss writing in a physical journal too... but I feel like it'd be easy to lose that or someone could pick it up and read it... hahaa. Or I could get one of those diaries that comes with a lock... do they still make those?
It's 9:30pm now and I could either watch more vlogmas videos ('tis the season), or I could edit my vlog, or I could read... hmmmm. I think I'll sit back and watch some vlogmas videos, haha. I love watching YouTube!
Tomorrow I'll edit my vlog and do some reading. Maybe I'll draft a blog post too...
I started this blog a few years ago, on the pretense that I would update it quite frequently to keep my writing up to date and to relieve any stress or to just talk about whatever is going on.
I really haven't done that and I honestly don't know why. For the last few months, a lot of things had happened. I'm still at my current work, I moved, and I'm updating my other blog more often and right now I'm doing vlogmas!
I think I've accomplished a lot, but this entire year I have been a VERY lazy person, and it needs to stop! It's okay to be lazy once in a while, but it kind of pains me because I am way too lazy and I always say I'll do all these cool things that are part of my goals, but I haven't come close to achieving those goals!!! Ahhhhh.
So I came back here to rant and outline my game plan. So uh, yeah, my game plan is:
- Make YouTube videos every month at least (if I can do once a week, that'll be a super achievement)
- Advertise my freelance biz more and get more prospects
- Blog as much as I can, focus on social media and build a brand
The ultimate goal is to be able to source my own income. That's my career goal and for my personal goals I would like to poke into my creativity a little more. I want to colour all of my coloring books (I have so many!), read the books I haven't picked up in a while (and read new ones), keep writing in this journal and a bunch of other fun stuff.
What I have done this year is gone to a lot of theatre shows, played more boardgames and also hung out with friends. I want to keep on doing this but also add the other things above as well.
Vlogmas is soooo tough! It's super challenging for me to vlog everyday because I don't do different things each day as often, so I have kinda been taking a break. I still need to finish editing Days 14 - 18 and put that up on YouTube. It's much easier to blog... haha but with blogging I definitely need to read more so I can build up my writing and vocabulary. It's a win-win situation!
Wow, writing this post really helped me unleash a lot of things I've been building up inside. It's tough for me to get stress out sometimes. Journaling was always something I did when I was younger to help understand myself better, to help me reflect and to help me feel more at ease with whatever was going on, so I better keep this up! Although, I do miss writing in a physical journal too... but I feel like it'd be easy to lose that or someone could pick it up and read it... hahaa. Or I could get one of those diaries that comes with a lock... do they still make those?
It's 9:30pm now and I could either watch more vlogmas videos ('tis the season), or I could edit my vlog, or I could read... hmmmm. I think I'll sit back and watch some vlogmas videos, haha. I love watching YouTube!
Tomorrow I'll edit my vlog and do some reading. Maybe I'll draft a blog post too...
Thursday, March 3, 2016
I can do it!
This whole week I had a lot of spare time... I could have edited my travel videos, but I didn't.
I go and watch videos on YouTube of people who traveled and edited their video within the day!! And for 12 days straight, they had to do that. I can't even do one video... one video that has footage recorded about 10 months ago! What the heck.
I was pretty close to actually start editing today... but I kept thinking of how I wasn't sure if I wanted to do a scripted video... where I talk over the footage, or if I just wanted to cut all the footage together... maybe I'll add some voiceover here and there... that might make things work? I dunno. I just want it to be interesting.
I also realized I didn't take THAT much footage... it's hard to make a coherent piece when you don't have a lot to work with. I think at most, each video would be about 2 minutes long... maybe even shorter. I think that might be a little frustrating to watch... but I would have to try it.
Okay, I'm going to output a video this weekend for sure!
I go and watch videos on YouTube of people who traveled and edited their video within the day!! And for 12 days straight, they had to do that. I can't even do one video... one video that has footage recorded about 10 months ago! What the heck.
I was pretty close to actually start editing today... but I kept thinking of how I wasn't sure if I wanted to do a scripted video... where I talk over the footage, or if I just wanted to cut all the footage together... maybe I'll add some voiceover here and there... that might make things work? I dunno. I just want it to be interesting.
I also realized I didn't take THAT much footage... it's hard to make a coherent piece when you don't have a lot to work with. I think at most, each video would be about 2 minutes long... maybe even shorter. I think that might be a little frustrating to watch... but I would have to try it.
Okay, I'm going to output a video this weekend for sure!
Sunday, February 28, 2016
Let's Get this Blog Thang Started
Okay, so... I haven't blogged at all. I'm sorry. I'm the kind of person who doesn't really keep up with my own personal commitments, and I don't keep up with my online commitments either. It's SO BAD and I need to get rid of this habit RIGHT NOW.
I was supposed to upload at least one video a month for this year on my main channel. Nope, I haven't uploaded ANYTHING on that channel. But I did upload a video on my vlog channel, so that sort of counts... no... no it shouldn't. It's already approaching the end of February now, that's two videos I owe for 2016 already.
I don't know what it is, but I really can't find the motivation for me to edit my Japan travel videos... I really need to put those up! I want to show everyone what an exciting trip we had, and what they could experience too when going to Japan.
I should think of video editing my personal projects as a release... a release from the everyday grind of work and volunteering. Something that is clearly for me. Yet, I can't dive into it. Maybe I'm afraid that no one will watch my videos? Maybe I'm afraid the people who I want to watch them, won't watch them? I dunno... I need to stop having expectations. It's fucking 2016 now.
This week I will definitely try to output at least one good video on my main channel. I actually started posting on my public blog again and it started to gain some leverage. I wanted to update it at least once a week, but I don't really have anything I'd like to review... but that being said, means I can definitely get this video out.
What day should I choose though? Maybe edit on Wednesday and get the video out on Thursday? That way it's a bit spread out from my usual routine... I usually edit on Monday nights for my volunteering.
I need to make-do with what I have. I would love to film more things, but I don't really have the space to do that or the right lighting at times. But, I'll make it work somehow!
I was supposed to upload at least one video a month for this year on my main channel. Nope, I haven't uploaded ANYTHING on that channel. But I did upload a video on my vlog channel, so that sort of counts... no... no it shouldn't. It's already approaching the end of February now, that's two videos I owe for 2016 already.
I don't know what it is, but I really can't find the motivation for me to edit my Japan travel videos... I really need to put those up! I want to show everyone what an exciting trip we had, and what they could experience too when going to Japan.
I should think of video editing my personal projects as a release... a release from the everyday grind of work and volunteering. Something that is clearly for me. Yet, I can't dive into it. Maybe I'm afraid that no one will watch my videos? Maybe I'm afraid the people who I want to watch them, won't watch them? I dunno... I need to stop having expectations. It's fucking 2016 now.
This week I will definitely try to output at least one good video on my main channel. I actually started posting on my public blog again and it started to gain some leverage. I wanted to update it at least once a week, but I don't really have anything I'd like to review... but that being said, means I can definitely get this video out.
What day should I choose though? Maybe edit on Wednesday and get the video out on Thursday? That way it's a bit spread out from my usual routine... I usually edit on Monday nights for my volunteering.
I need to make-do with what I have. I would love to film more things, but I don't really have the space to do that or the right lighting at times. But, I'll make it work somehow!
Tuesday, January 12, 2016
It's 2016???!
Hi.
Soooooo I have been super AFK.
Yikes, the last time I updated this blog was back in August 2015. AUGUST 2015?? WTF. That was like (counts on fingers) 5 months ago!
Blogging just dropped... completely. I was really busy with my job, filming and a bunch of other things. Also, I HAD MY DIGITAL MARKETING CLASS!! And it was fucking awesome.
I recently finished Felicia Day's book, You're Never Weird on the Internet (Almost) and while I was reading it, I started thinking about how awkward I feel and why I feel awkard when it comes to socializing with people... also the same as Felicia Day. Ahhh so cool how we have similarities!!
Anyway, during my thought process, I realized how I didn't feel awkward when I was in my early teens. This was mainly because I used to blog ALL the time... like everyday on Livejournal, back when it was the coolest thing.
Because I wrote everyday, my words were easier to form in real life, in person... when socializing with other people, and also with writing in general. Yeah, I write a lot of emails at work, but that's not as much as I would write if I were to blog everyday.
That's why I came back to blog today.
Now when I was younger, I mostly would blog about school, Neopets and my online shenanigans. But now I'm an adult and not in school, working and I no longer play Neopets or have online shenanigans... so I'll mainly keep this blog updated with goal progress and the like.
But first an update on what has happened in the last few months. I think I have accomplished quite a lot:
- I went to Vancouver with my bf and got to see some friends :)
- I became more cultured after going to a few theatre events
- I made new friends
- I did a digital marketing class! Not certified yet in SEO though haha but getting there!
Things I didn't do:
- Edit and upload my Japan videos. Yeah, these are long overdue... I'm going to upload at least one a month, though!
- Keep my Wordpress updated - I did one post, to promote my Vlogmas series, but that's about it. Hoping to get back into that flow soon though!
- Work on my website. - It needs a total makeover, now. I still have four months left on my domain/hosting... I think I might go with a different host afterwards, for some reason my site is slow whenever I update things on my Wordpress. There's probably an allocated amount of space that I'm using up....
Yup. Got a few things on my plate! Go, motivation, let's go!
Soooooo I have been super AFK.
Yikes, the last time I updated this blog was back in August 2015. AUGUST 2015?? WTF. That was like (counts on fingers) 5 months ago!
Blogging just dropped... completely. I was really busy with my job, filming and a bunch of other things. Also, I HAD MY DIGITAL MARKETING CLASS!! And it was fucking awesome.
I recently finished Felicia Day's book, You're Never Weird on the Internet (Almost) and while I was reading it, I started thinking about how awkward I feel and why I feel awkard when it comes to socializing with people... also the same as Felicia Day. Ahhh so cool how we have similarities!!
Anyway, during my thought process, I realized how I didn't feel awkward when I was in my early teens. This was mainly because I used to blog ALL the time... like everyday on Livejournal, back when it was the coolest thing.
Because I wrote everyday, my words were easier to form in real life, in person... when socializing with other people, and also with writing in general. Yeah, I write a lot of emails at work, but that's not as much as I would write if I were to blog everyday.
That's why I came back to blog today.
Now when I was younger, I mostly would blog about school, Neopets and my online shenanigans. But now I'm an adult and not in school, working and I no longer play Neopets or have online shenanigans... so I'll mainly keep this blog updated with goal progress and the like.
But first an update on what has happened in the last few months. I think I have accomplished quite a lot:
- I went to Vancouver with my bf and got to see some friends :)
- I became more cultured after going to a few theatre events
- I made new friends
- I did a digital marketing class! Not certified yet in SEO though haha but getting there!
Things I didn't do:
- Edit and upload my Japan videos. Yeah, these are long overdue... I'm going to upload at least one a month, though!
- Keep my Wordpress updated - I did one post, to promote my Vlogmas series, but that's about it. Hoping to get back into that flow soon though!
- Work on my website. - It needs a total makeover, now. I still have four months left on my domain/hosting... I think I might go with a different host afterwards, for some reason my site is slow whenever I update things on my Wordpress. There's probably an allocated amount of space that I'm using up....
Yup. Got a few things on my plate! Go, motivation, let's go!
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